Our Story .... Part IV

Matt: Ah, the walk on the beach. Nothing like a good, refreshing walk to open up an honest discourse and let the lusts of one's heart burst forth. And a beach? Well where else can the romantic sounds of crashing waves, singing sand, and drunken fraternity boys be heard so clearly? The stars were aligned, the moon was full, and I just knew that this was the chance I had been waiting for.

So what happened, you ask? Funny, because I'm not recalling all the details myself. It could have had something to do with the consumption of beverages illicit for minors on a hot beach earlier that day. While that will remain a riddle for the ages, I do remember a few key occurrences.

1) I walked REALLY FAST. We were walking with a few friends - Rachel, Darius? - but I wanted Jenn ALONE. So I kept walking faster and faster, and at one point I ran a little bit, playfully, to try to get her separated from the pack. My Discovery Channel viewings paid off, and I eventually succeeded. We got quite a ways ahead.

2) I saw some abandoned beach chairs that I bee-lined for and suggested we both sit down in. Just my luck! Immediately after we sat down, my blood pressure jumped and my heart began racing. This was IT. The chance. The two of us alone. I had so much to say. So many feelings and emotions I wanted to share. Wow, I was totally going to creep her out. Was I? Am I creepy? No, this is love! I must let her know. She'll be flattered. She'll fall into my arms. Maybe we'll have sex? No, probably pushing it just a bit. Take it slow, Skip. Nice and easy.

3) That's when I heard the door slam, and realized that there's nowhere left to run. I felt the cold hand, and wondered if I'd ever see the sun. I closed my eyes, and hoped that this was just imagination. But all the while, I heard the creature creeping up behind (Darius? Rachel?). I was out of time. Wait......no, no. That's not really what happened.

4) Ah, yes, what did happen: I said "What a nice night!" over and over. I commented on the nice water, the nice sand, the nice air.... just about everything was nice. And I said nothing I had intended to say. Not a single peep, utterance, sneeze, or cough of what was on my mind.

5) We headed back, and I resigned myself to the fact that I had utterly failed my mission.

So the rest of the trip was mediocre. I had fun, don't get me wrong - going to clubs, drinking, going to the beach, riding scooters, golfing - but I was so captivated by this one Jenn, and I only wanted to spend time with Her, that when I wasn't I was miserable.

Jenn and Leesie left Panama City before the rest of the group did. We were supposed to stay over at Rachel's in New Orleans on the way back, and get back to Houston a day later, but all I wanted to do was get back to Rice. I think everybody was tired, so it didn't take too much persuasion, but I certainly pushed hard and head straight back to Houston we did.

Jenn was only back 6 hours when I IM'd her.

"Hey! We decided to head straight back."

I think she was a little surprised and possibly 6% suspicious, because instead of her usual instant reply I had to wait about 30 seconds.

"Hi. Umm.. I though you guys were staying at Rachel's overnight. What happened?"

Hmmm. "We are all really tired and exhausted." 10 seconds later. "What are you up to tonight?"

And that's when she said she needed to buy towels. If there's one thing Skip Conrad loves, it's shopping for bed and bath products. With Jenn. So I offered my valet services knowing she didn't have a car, and said that I would be more than happy to take her to Target. Thus began our first "date."

On Kitchen Gadgets

Jenn: It's Matt's turn to update the Jenn & Matt story, so for those of you waiting on an update... I'm truly sorry. Pester him. I am, and I all I get is that he'll write it when he's feeling "inspired." To his credit, right now he's not feeling much but very cough-y and sore throat-y. I'd write it, but I feel the next part is best told from his point of view...

If you haven't picked up on this yet by reading my other blogs (shameless plug - they're on the left hand side of the page), I really like food and cooking. Which might come as a bit of surprise if you take a look around my kitchen, as I have a complete lack of kitchen gadgets (I don't have a full size food processor or stand mixer, or even a rolling pin). I thought it might be fun to do a run down on what I consider the top 10 necessary kitchen gadgets, in no particular order:

1) Microplane grater: This incredibly sharp, easy to use, easy to store grater has only one flaw: it's a little bit hard to clean. It grates sponges, and fingers. However, a quick rinse after grating and brushing with a stiff bristled dish brush seems to do the trick. I use it with garlic a lot, but it's good with anything that needs to be minced, grated, shredded, etc.

2) Kitchen tongs: I used chopsticks until I finally caved and decided to get a pair of tongs at crate & barrel. I haven't looked back and now that Felicia got me a second pair (and so nifty!) I can double-tong things! Tongs are so much better than any other tool for gripping hot food items, and now even come with silicone covers on the ends so they can be used on pans that might be damaged by metal tools - though I plan on phasing all of those out of my kitchen soon.

3) Big stock pot! I've always had a big pot for making sauces, but nothing beats a huge stock pot that can hold entire bird carcasses after roasting a chicken or turkey so you can make a rich stock out of the leftovers. Any soup, gravy, etc. made from that base is 1000x better than whatever you might make from the canned or boullion stuff.

4) Ovenproof skillet: This was a specific requirement of the Zuni cafe roasted chicken recipe and ever since I got one I've used it for roasting all kinds of meat. You can't beat something that can sear and go straight into the oven. I'm all for using as few dishes/pans as possible when cooking. P.S. I bought one at target for probably around $20 and it's awesome.

5) Good knife set: Again, a target purchase - probably $50. What? you're saying - this isn't a gadget, all chefs need knives to cook. I consider it a gadget. My mom, an exceptional cook, probably has never had a knife set - only one chef knife, a meat cleaver, and a paring knife. I consider huge knife sets overkill, but it's nice to have a block to keep them from nicking each other.

6) Rice paddle: It's an asian thing.

7) One handed pepper grinder: It's essential when preparing anything that requires a "dirty" hand and a "clean" hand - breading meat, etc. Unfortunately, every one handed pepper grinder I've ever bought has broken, and they aren't cheap. My last one broke last week. I'm considering putting 10 on my registry since they're really the only thing I need.

8) Rice cooker: It's an asian thing - but if you ever have trouble making rice, get one!

9) Immersion blender: How does anyone live without this? You don't need a mixer, food processor, or any of that silliness. My immersion blender makes velvety soups, mixes cupcake batter, whips cream, makes dressing, and all without having to remove what's being blended from the container. Genius.

10) ??? What's your favorite kitchen gadget? What should be added to this list?

We interrupt this story to bring you

Jenn: A wedding planning update! Since we've been engaged about a year and a half at this point, I suppose we really ought to get started with the whole wedding planning. It's a hugely daunting task though - and I'll tell ya why. I've never been enamored with the whole idea of a "dream wedding" with the big dress, flowers, perfect ceremony, rituals, yada yada. But there's enormous pressure to buy into the whole thing - to the point where you can't really rent a facility without wanting to coordinate centerpieces. It makes me understand why people elope.

Part of the problem is that, having lived together for nearly six years, Matt and I are common-law married, and the whole thing feels like a big scam. Food & beverage minimums plus $1,000 just to rent the facility? 22% service fee whether I like the service or not? Why can't I just throw a big party in my favorite restaurant and call it a day? Too untraditional. Argh.

We thought we might be able to worm our way into cheaper facilities by not telling people it's a wedding. You know, just an "event" - since the word "wedding" seems to mean automatic 40% markup on everything. One place we fell in love with went from $10k for the event to $16k for the wedding between emails. Good god. Somehow they seem to be able to sniff it out and no amount of sweet talking brings them down.

Anyway, I've begun looking at places in earnest because I really would like to get it done in 2009.

We should have just done it in Vegas.

Our story... Part III

Jenn: Leesie and I returned from Spinnaker just as JBuck and Matt were busy getting ALL the alcohol in the room confiscated. We weren't particularly perturbed, as our plans for the trip consisted of a) walking along the beach in little bikinis, b) renting scooters and riding them in little bikinis, c) swimming in the pool in little bikinis, d) dancing in... little outfits. Maybe if the boys had been getting bikinis confiscated we would have been pissed, but as it was, we crashed in bed after a night of intense dancing and getting whistled at. Exhausting.

I awoke waaaay too early the next morning to the sounds of incredibly cheerful birds outside. Foggily, I looked over and wondered if Matt was planning on getting out of the bed, but he drowsily rolled another inch closer to me. Hmmm... this was kind of nice, but I had beach-walking to do. We left the rest of the (kind of angry) group to figure out the alcohol situation, and headed out to see what the Michigander boys next door were up to.

Leesie and I spent the afternoon riding scooters, beach walking, and swimming in the pool. It was lovely. Later in the evening, we headed back to the room. Matt and the rest of the group was there, having replenished (and then deplenished) the alcohol supply. They were drunkenly playing Smash Brothers and hanging out on the beds, having spent the day on the beach. Leesie and I intended to drop in to change before going out again, but then (somewhat tipsy) Matt approached me.

"Hey," he asked, "What are you up to? We should go for a walk on the beach."

A walk on the beach? This could get interesting...

Our story... Part II

Matt: Just to clarify, the look that I had when Jenn commanded that I share her bed was far more "longing" than "terror." I was so elated, a little man (mini Matt) was jumping and doing cartwheels in my stomach. YESSS! Everything is falling into place.

You see, I had a crush on Jenn. A 100% totally over-the-top goo-goo ga-ga she's-hotter-than-a-volcano can't-stop-thinking-about-her WOW crush. I don't know exactly when it started, but it was about a month or two earlier that semester. I just "noticed" one day that, ah, yeah, I really LIKE her. Reinforced as I spent time with her at work and those crazy Telefund parties, I couldn't stop thinking about her. Well, my wonderfully concocted spring break trip was going to be the perfect opportunity for letting her know how I felt and then wisking her off her feet on the moonlit beach.

That first night, I wanted to just play it cool. You know, keep my feelings on the down-low until we got settled in. After a day I'd start working my magic. When Jenn asked me to go out with her and Leesie that night, I'd just have to say no.

"See you guys later. Don't wait up for us. We'll be back really late." And off Jenn and Leesie went to some club.

Well, OK. That couldn't have been any easier. This will be fun. I'll put back some beers with J Buck, play video games with the other hermits in the room, and have a crazy first night. This is what spring break is all about. Can't wait!

Tick. Tick. Tick.

9:30 pm. Wow. 15 minutes have gone by. Sweet.

Tick. Tockkk. Tiiiiickkkkkk.

9:35 pm. I wonder what Jenn is up to? Having fun yet? Right now she's probably, oh, almost to the line for the club. Sweet. Fun.

OK, OK. Can't stop thinking about her. Time for a beer.

J Buck and I decided it would be better to have a drink outside in the fresh air than in the musty dankness of our over-capacity, under-cleaned HoJo motel room. So we pulled some chairs outside the door, cracked open a few cold ones, and starting drinking and soaking up the glory of what was to come over the next week. Mind you, we weren't 21 yet, but this was spring break, so who could possibly care?

A shadow appeared around the corner of the building and slowly grew into a large man, who perhaps misread the map and just happened to be heading toward our room. Probably just a drunk football player.

"Good evening guys. Having a beer I see? I'm going to need to see some ID."

"Ummmm. Ah.... yes, ID. Very good suggestion, of course we have them, both of us that is, have IDs. You know, with the little square pictures? Really dreadful pictures to be honest but I suppose they'll have to do. Probably not even necessary to show you then, right, I mean....

"IDs please."

"Ah, they're inside."

As I go inside to get our IDs, I suspected something "slightly negative" was about to happen. Maybe we'd have to move our drinking back inside.

"Hmm.. Not 21 I see. Guys, that's going to be a problem."

Another security guard seemed to vaporize from the air on our right.

"Bill and I can't allow any underage drinking. Do you have any more alcohol in the room?"

Hahaha. He must be kidding. Is serious? More booze in the room?

"Yes."

"Well then, you and your friend need to go in and get every last bottle and bring it out."

Our less party-inclined friends were already fast asleep in the room. As J Buck and I walked through the dark room, tripping over bags, clanking bottles, and spilling plastic cups, it became apparent to our slumbering brethren that there was something "slightly negative" going on. As in, their $500 of alcohol, purchased with hard-earned student dollars in advance of the trip specifically because most of us weren't 21, was being confiscated by HoJo security.

"Guys - we've got to take this. Is that everything?"

I wondered if possibly by good fortune one of my roomates had hid a bottle from me, so that I could honestly say yes to Bill here but still have a little something inside for later. So I replied "Yes." Of course, indeed J Buck and I had brought every last bottle and beer out.

Well, the trip's off to a great start. The alcohol has all been confiscated, everybody's pissed at me and J Buck because we got it confiscated, and Jenn and Leesie are out having a terrific time while I'm sitting in the dark back at the beautiful HoJo Panama City. Fan-TAS-tic. Time for bed.

I finally got to sleep about 2 hours later, and must have woken up again about 3 hours after that when the door opened. It was a serial killer.

I mean, it was Jenn....

Our story... Part I

Jenn: Most everyone reading this probably knows that Matt and I have been together for so long we're practically an old married couple. What you might not know is that we got all the squabbling and fighting part of being married out of the way in the first couple years of our relationship - or maybe those of you who are our close friends know that only too well!

I was a flirtatious sophomore very much enjoying life when Matt took it into his head to fall quite unexpectedly in love with me. He managed to persuade my friend Rachel to persuade me to come along with a group of 8 other people (so romantic!) on a spring break trip to Panama City, where he planned to woo me. I drove to Panama City a day early, with our friend Leesie, took one look at the tiny room crammed with two doubles and a bunk bed, and claimed a top bunk for myself as the bed least likely to end up being puked on or drunkenly mistaken for a hookup spot.

With 10 people and only 5 beds (an air mattress would be brought by one of the group), I cast about in my brain for the best candidate to share my bed with. This Matt guy, I thought, he seems pretty harmless. So when Matt showed up the next day, I pointed at him as he walked through the door. "You," I commanded before anyone else could lay claim, "You're sharing a bed with me." Leesie and I left to go saunter on the beach before I caught the look of terror/shock/longing in his face. What happened next was a comedy of errors...