Jenn: A wedding planning update! Since we've been engaged about a year and a half at this point, I suppose we really ought to get started with the whole wedding planning. It's a hugely daunting task though - and I'll tell ya why. I've never been enamored with the whole idea of a "dream wedding" with the big dress, flowers, perfect ceremony, rituals, yada yada. But there's enormous pressure to buy into the whole thing - to the point where you can't really rent a facility without wanting to coordinate centerpieces. It makes me understand why people elope.
Part of the problem is that, having lived together for nearly six years, Matt and I are common-law married, and the whole thing feels like a big scam. Food & beverage minimums plus $1,000 just to rent the facility? 22% service fee whether I like the service or not? Why can't I just throw a big party in my favorite restaurant and call it a day? Too untraditional. Argh.
We thought we might be able to worm our way into cheaper facilities by not telling people it's a wedding. You know, just an "event" - since the word "wedding" seems to mean automatic 40% markup on everything. One place we fell in love with went from $10k for the event to $16k for the wedding between emails. Good god. Somehow they seem to be able to sniff it out and no amount of sweet talking brings them down.
Anyway, I've begun looking at places in earnest because I really would like to get it done in 2009.
We should have just done it in Vegas.
Part of the problem is that, having lived together for nearly six years, Matt and I are common-law married, and the whole thing feels like a big scam. Food & beverage minimums plus $1,000 just to rent the facility? 22% service fee whether I like the service or not? Why can't I just throw a big party in my favorite restaurant and call it a day? Too untraditional. Argh.
We thought we might be able to worm our way into cheaper facilities by not telling people it's a wedding. You know, just an "event" - since the word "wedding" seems to mean automatic 40% markup on everything. One place we fell in love with went from $10k for the event to $16k for the wedding between emails. Good god. Somehow they seem to be able to sniff it out and no amount of sweet talking brings them down.
Anyway, I've begun looking at places in earnest because I really would like to get it done in 2009.
We should have just done it in Vegas.
I went with my brother and future sister-in-law to look at wedding venues and it only reminded me how much of a pain it was. KEEP THE MONEY! You just can't do a wedding for less than $15,000 and all you really have to remember it are a bunch of pictures. I don't remember anything about our wedding that wasn't captured in a picture. It was such a hectic day.
ReplyDeleteGo to Hawaii or something like that. Buy a cute white flowy dress and get a preacher and two witnesses. The wedding budget can pay for a few close family members and everyone else can pay to go there themselves. Personally, I'd love for you to go to Hawaii - then we'd have an excuse to take a vacation! :)
Seriously, don't do the whole big-wedding thing. It's your party, so if you don't want to buy in, don't buy in.
ReplyDeleteFelicia
Dr. Felicia is wise -- she speaks Japanese after all -- but I'd like to join her into adding social pressure to do a big restaurant thing. :)
ReplyDeleteI feel fortunate that Argentine girls have no concept of how doneup American weddings are.
Evan
Well just throwing a big party at a restaurant would be different from having the huge wedding. We might be able to pull that off if I can think of the right restaurant. With all the restaurants I've been to you would think I could manage!
ReplyDeleteIf I do it, are you coming back for it?
I love the idea of doing a tiny little ceremony somewhere (with or without immediate family... which I know is a stress point all its own) and then throwing a big party at a restaurant with less than half the money you'd otherwise be spending. It just makes so much more SENSE! And it's much more "you" too. Or "you two" too ;)
ReplyDeleteSeriously...you don't need to spend a lot of money and you guys certainly don't have to do anything you don't want to do. I think a restuarant party would be a great idea... :)
ReplyDeleteOne of my best friends is doing the restaurant wedding thing at Cullen's (www.cullenshouston.com/). Not that I've eaten there or know anything about the pricing, but I could report back in August!
ReplyDelete